Men: Commit This to Memory!

The October 2008 issue of GQ magazine (I prefer to call it the Bible, so be aware as posts go on) is now out. In it I have found a very good article. that all men need to pay attention to. GQ has issued 66 rules, tips, and secrets for living -- and looking -- like a civilized man.

I agree with the article that society in general, and manhood specifically, has been casual-ified. Some of the new rules have their place in a modern world. But as you know, I am classic on many things. We have left behind tradition, and put in its place Abercrombie & Fitch, and Blackberries. Meaning, we live by the Internet (not people), and expensive ragged clothes. Am I the only one confused here? What happened to basic human decency. Whether it is clothes, etiquette, or whatever, the gentleman should still be present. Those ugly butch lezzie feminists have stolen the GQ man. It's time for him to make a new appearance. Below I have included what I think are the most central words about style from this article. Men, pay attention.

No.3 Find A Signature Scent

If you have an everyday scent, people will start to register you invisibly -- and more important, remember you. Get a couple of samples and test-drive them for a day. The right one will make people enjoying being near you. Once you have selected the one scent, master its application. You want a single short spray on the top of each forearm, one on the neck, and one down the back of the shirt (before you button up, pull the collar back and aim downward). Play with it until you get it right.

No.7 The Dating Man

Be decent about your one-night stands. You don't have to date her or even see her again, but you do have to take her call. And if she wants to hang out and you don't, you have to man up and tell her the truth ... as gently as you can. And don't then call her the next week at 1 am looking for round two. I think the lesson here should be to just be upfront about your intentions. Game is a limp dicked man's security blanket. Direct honesty works a lot better. If you want her for one night, make it clear.

No.19 Lose the Novelty Drawers

Your underpants shouldn't be funny. They shouldn't have jokes on them. They shouldn't have been "cool in college."

No.54 Locker Room

You have to be at least partially clothes to strike up a conversation in the locker room.

No.55 Plane, Train, and Automobile ... Trips

Getting on a plane isn't an excuse to look like a schlub. Dress comfortably but stylishly. No Sweatpants. No Flip-flops.

That was a just a taste of what GQ is offering this month. I suggest that every man pick up a copy and read through it. It has great tips on how to be comfortably stylish, how to break up, the must-haves of gentleman's style. Specifically, there's a piece on the right watch. I told you all to think Bond. There are some vintage-inspired watches that are very Goldfinger, or Dr. No.

Here's to style. Cheers!

From the Catwalk to the Sidewalk: How High-End Fashion Influences Your Low-End Prêt-à-Porter

If you're Kimora Lee Simmons, the cast of "Gossip Girl," or even Anna Wintour, you know the best place in the world to be is New York City when Fashion Week starts. Why? It is the premiere event for fashion. And you will probably never go.

Most people will never get into a show in their lifetime. They can't afford the clothes, nor would they wear them in public if they ever could afford them. So, your question is probably why you should care about fashion. You, the average, everyday man or woman, has been inspired by most of the pieces on the runways. You didn't know it

Whether it's the hot "It" items, or the trendy color, or the trendy design, you will find that it trickles its way down to the more affordable stores. Have you been to H & M lately? What about Old Navy? Forever 21 perhaps? I know ... Target? Yes, well thank those overpaid designers like Poenza Schouler and Issac Mizrahi for the fashionable (and affordable) clothes on your back right now.

Meet the Proenza Schouler blouse for Fall 2008:

Nice, isn't it? This blouse will run about $600. Would you wear it on the street though? Probably not. So, how do you take this little number to the sidewalk?

Now, as a personal style tip, I don't care for the bows on shirts. The bow has become a staple on the runway this year. If you're a bow girl, go for it. If you want something a little different, tie it like a regular men's tie ... with a double Windsor knot. It's a little bigger, but it will be a risk worth me looking at.

Let's try something else a little harder to take from the runway. Have any of you seen the Dolce & Gabbana Metal corset?

Very couture, right? Well, let's assume that you can afford this lovely item. How would you wear it? I think this is a perfect item for cocktail hour, or a night out on the town. Definitely Evening kind of wear. Try mixing it into this style below for a little added edginess to your wardrobe. This is just a simple dress, and all the accessories you can match up at a local department store. On a cooler evening, I would get a nice trench, very slim and thin fabric, leave it untied, and put the corset over it as a belt. Just play with the look.

I will tell you the greatest, and easiest secret to turning runway fashions into expressway fashions. Listen closely. Never wear an entire runway look. Take the overall message of the fashions. If metal is in...find some metal accessories and add them to your wardrobe. If the new color is purple, then find a purple blouse, or purple jewelry, or something like that. The point of the runway in your everyday clothes is influence, not completely imitation. You should be picking bits an pieces of the runway into your clothes.

Here's a photo from this year's Fashion Week. Now stop for a minute and think about what she's wearing. It looks nice on a runway, but who would look just as good walking down the street in it? I think no one. So, how do we fix it? See that vest? Wear it. But here's what you do differently. Take a good pair of black heels, find a white t-shirt that is much smaller, and pull off that look. Get your hair in a low ponytail, and find some dangling earrings. A black chunky bracelet and a skull rocker ring wouldn't hurt the look either. See? That wasn't so bad.

This one was a fairly easy try, but I want to you to get in the habit of looking at clothes as pieces, not an entire look. It is not an entire look until you have it on your body, and it looks good. Got it? Think you can do it with something a little harder? Let's give it another try.

Remember what I said. Stop. Take a look at the entire outfit. Now, break it down piece by piece. Find what works and what doesn't. Then, think about why certain pieces don't work. What makes them inappropriate for everyday wear. Now, can you fix those problems? Hint: the answer is almost always yes, so don't automatically dismiss an outfit. That's a fashion coward.

Did you find everything you needed? Let's see. So, you stopped and took a look at the clothes, right? What did you see?

Wrong! Here's what you should have taken from this photo. First, if you notice, all the girls are wearing jewel tones. That is big this season. Did you see the Emmy Awards last night. Many women were wearing these colors. There's your first style choice. Secondly, you should have noticed that all colors were mixed with black and gold, which should help you find the right accessories. And patent leather ... the shoes, the bags, the belts. Love it. Wear it. Look great with it. And all the garments show the neckline, not the cleavage. This season is a bare neck and shoulders. These are the best parts of woman, and should be on display because it's them last parts to go if they look good on you. I'd even venture to suggest the ankle boots. It's a more French style, but it is all over the runway and the sidewalk. Short skirts, legging, both paired with ankle boots. Get used to it. It has been coming harder and harder since the Devil Wears Prada. The one below is Miu Miu, patent leather. They're from 2007, but patent leather hasn't made its way out yet, so you're still good.

Here's to style. Cheers!

Timeless Styles: What You Should Know?

Tonight's blog is on timeless styles. What are they? How should people wear them? Fashion is not an exact science in all aspects. There are certain things that one can do in order to always be in style.

So, below you will find my style must-haves that will turn any of you into a timeless fashionista.

1. Jeans

Yes, jeans. Ladies and Gentlemen, these are here to stay. The idea of jeans began all the way back in the 16th century, so it is clear they aren't going anywhere anytime soon. They hit their height of popularity beginning in the 1950s, but they have been around for quite some time. Now, we have them in any different styles, fabrics, colors. They are fabulous. And they are a timeless pant.

The way you should wear them is where we divide trendy with timeless. YOUR JEANS SHOULD FIT!!! A good pair of jeans should hug a woman's curves comfortably, but not tightly. Think Valentino here ladies. Valentino gowns caress a woman like a man's hand. Your jeans should do no less. I am a fond believer in the straight leg as a staple in your closet. They can be paired off with many styles of shoes. So, in the jeans department ladies, you should find a pair of jeans that fit at your actual waist (low rise will not be timeless), that break at the bottom just right, and that hug your body just right. With that said, understand that not every wash, or cut, will fit you and look great. You should be able to stand and sit wearing them, and still be comfortable. It's a hard task, I know. But, the reward is the perfect jean that will always be in your closet waiting to jazz up any outfit you create for the occasion.

Men, jeans should be at your waist as well. Our waist for jeans should be at the beginning of our love line ... that V just below the belly button. Your jeans Should sit right on your ass, comfortably, and without moving once you are dressed. So, YOUR JEANS SHOULD FIT TOO!!! For those of you unaware, sagging is believed to have originated in prison. Prisoners are not allowed to wear belts for fear of hanging themselves, etc. So, their clothes sag. This is the more pleasant explanation of sagging, linked to why men equate this style with being "hard." The reality of the trend is, or at least has been thought to be the reality is, that sagging was used by the prison bitches so that they weren't caught fucking. When you sag in prison (where many don't have underwear to wear), your ass is exposed just underneath your shirt. You can easily lift that shirt up, presenting your ass for your "husband," and he can go to town on you. If a guard walks by, your husband can easily dismount, and you both can be on your way without anyone being the wiser since you didn't have to adjust any of your clothing. Stop being bitches men. Pull your pants back up, get a pair that fit (not 8 sizes larger than you), and let's go from their. A classic pair of Levi's on a man can't be sexier.

2. Accessories

I have said it over and over again. Accessories make an outfit. Now, this area is a little tricky because accessories do follow trends. However, there are some must-haves that you can always fall back on any decade, and be alright.

Women:

You will always need a string of pearls. I tend to recommend the longer strands of pearls that can be wrapped several times, or tied, or just worn long. They are more versatile than the shorter strands. Pearls are classic, and will always be a glamor choice. They can go elegant, trendy, day, night, and so on. You will need to do your homework on pearls to make sure you select properly. But, like the jeans, once you have them ... they will be used for years to come.

Men:

You will always need a watch. There should always be a watch in your dresser that isn't flashy, but is sophisticated, and masculine. Think Movado ... A James Bond style of watch.

3. The Little Black Dress

That's right. A woman should always have a little black dress that is fit for a funeral, a night out, or a night in ;-). Coco Chanel created this little number, but it is something that every woman should have in her closet. It's all all-purpose fashion, and when you have the right one ... timeless. The trick to this one though is to buy it thinking ahead. You should be able to wear it now, and have it be altered later if necessary. So, your little black dress should not be that little. It should be a grown woman's dress. Not meant for street trash. I cannot stress that enough ... the highest it should go is just above the knee. Strict adherence to this rule should be observed. You might want this dress to go with your pearls, so have that in mind when selecting both.

4. The Perfect Suit

Please see my previous blog about this guys. It is a must-have for every man.

5. Matching Personality

For my final must-have for timeless style, I recommend that you understand your personality, and the vibe you put out in the world. Your clothes should reflect who you are. If you are an elegant person, you won't pull off the rocker look. So, don't try it.

My suggestion for both men and women is to sit down, flip through a few catalogs and fashion magazines, and really think about the person you want to project to the world. There is no one look for everyone. Even the staples I mentioned above have variations depending on the person. So, your must-have is to have a personality that matches your style. Risky fashions look out of place on a reserved person, and reserved fashions look wrong on a person who always takes risks. If you aren't the type for the clothes, be careful of wearing it. You make your look.

These are my best must-haves for timeless fashions. Each of the above items are what I recommend that we all have in our closet, regardless of what style you like, your body type, whatever.

I understand that this blog may be a little vague to you, and may not answer every question you have. You have to understand that personal style is just that. It is hard to write a general blog geared toward such a case-by-case issue. My blogs are meant to guide you in the right direction. I want you to think about what I have suggested, and do the work it takes to learn more. I hope to be a consultant one day on this type of thing so that you can each come to me individually. That way, I can go into a more detailed analysis of your personal needs, and help you more. For now, you will all have to do with taking my suggestions broadly, and using them to guide you specifically.

Here's to style. Cheers!

NO ... WIRE ... HANGERS ... EVER!!!! Let's just use models instead.

As soon as the idea of this blog was presented to me, that little line from the extremely campy movie, Mommie Dearest, came to mind. And I think it is the most appropriate title for this blog.

I was asked the other day my opinion as a "fashionista" on the super skinny model phenomenon. Why do designers want such emaciated women walking down the runway in their clothes? Why is walking death so chic? In a word? Hangers ... that's the key.

There are a few out there who would suggest that it is more cost effective to have slender models because you would use a lot less fabric to make the sample garment, thereby cutting down the cost of making the initial outfit for the fashion show. Granted, that is true. But, in the long run, when you are creating a gown that you plan to price at thousands of dollars above it's actual production costs, an extra square inch of fabric will not matter so much that the entire industry has to embrace the concept.

No, what we are talking about with this trend is simply a presentation of the clothes. Models are supposed to be hangers. Put this image in your mind: clothes shopping in a department store. What do you do when you see a dress you like. You take it in front of a mirror, on its hanger, and you put it up against your body. Then you visualize what it would look like on your body. That's the model's job. She is supposed to walk down the runway as if a walking hanger with a dress on it. You visualize yourself in the outfit. That's why the clothes on the runway tend to drape on the model's body. When it's on a hanger, there's no form to it. You, as the buyer, are the form. You have to want to be in the clothes. Sometimes when you see a model filling out an outfit, you start telling yourself that you can't wear it. It's couture ladies! It is meant to be made to fit.

Many designers, former model Iman as well, have stated that models are simply human

hangers. They are not supposed to stand out at all. They are meaningless. Fashion is about the clothes, and the model's job is to do all that is possible to make the clothes the centerpiece. What do you notice when Beyonce wears a gown? You notice Beyonce, right? You also notice her gown, but you are focused on her hourglass figure in that gown. When you see a skinny model on the runway, what do you notice? You notice her clothes, then you notice she's a skinny ass model. See the difference? A model with a body makes you notice her first, clothes second. A skinny model makes you notice the clothes first, then maybe her ... maybe. What do you think a clothing designer wants to get the first notice? Enough said.

Having explained that, I do want to make mention that this bone-thin look is not a fashion look. While there is a reason for emaciated models to become the "it" item for designers, it should not be the body type of all women. Somehow this look has infected the conscious of all women. No no no! You are not a hanger women. Get that out of your mind. Models need to be skinny because they need to be invisible. Clothing stands out the best when the body is a blank.

Do you want to be invisible in haute couture? Hell no! You want to be seen everywhere. You are the star attraction everyday. On the runway, only, is where the star must be the clothes. So, push that spotlight -hogging bitch out of your light, and eat something. John Mayer referred to Jenner Love Hewitt's body as a Wonderland. You've seen her body....it is not catwalk worthy. So if her body is wonderland with curves, why are you all aspiring to look like the ticket stub that men hold onto until they get into that park? Think about it ...

And as always: here's to style. Cheers!

Just A Quick Round of Applause

Someone was saying today that America's Next Top Model needs to go. I had to wholeheartedly disagree with her. While we all have our little annoyances with Tyra Banks, I can't say I would want the show to go. The main reason, if I ever doubted the shows relevance to high fashion, haute couture modeling, is this photo from the second week:

Meet Lauren Brie. Last week, this girl was at the bottom of the pack with her photo. She just didn't quite have it yet. This week, after some coaching, she cranked out what has been dubbed by all of the judges as the best photo ever in ANTM history. And I would certainly agree. From the "broken arm" pose, to the angry attitude of her face, to the amazing position of her legs, this shot is platinum. I've never seen one like it before. This photo actually tops Eva's shot from Cycle 3, and you all know how much I loved Eva the Diva.

Regardless of Tyra Banks' consistency in making everything about herself, she is cranking out girls who bring some integrity back into modeling. She is bringing back the models who learned their industry, learned their craft, and excelled at it, rather than just look pretty and snort up everything you make. These girls are learning to be businesswomen. Even though their job is to look pretty, there's a difference in "model pretty" that most models don't understand, and that's why they continue to struggle for fame. Think of Tyra as the Mercer Law School of the fashion world. She is teaching these girls how to "practice" modeling so that they will hit the ground running. I have to respect that.

And the results? Just look above ... flawless!

Here's to style. Cheers!

(*** I do hope you notice that I drink a lot where fashion is concerned. It's just so stressful to teach you all to be stunning. Ah well, bottoms up.***)

Fashion: The Unacknowledged Candidate

Well, it was brought to my attention that I needed to take a moment and comment on the styles of politicians ... or should I say, lack of style. Here goes.

It is true, most all politicians lack a sense of real style. They have PR people, hair people, makeup people, the works to look good to the public, and yet they rarely ever do. Men look drab and lifeless, and women look like....well Janet Reno with a little more makeup. That is not a happy day for me. I don't know about you, but I would like to see the leaders of my nation looking like they are worth the praise they get in their high offices. Just because you are helping to run a country doesn't mean you have an excuse to look awful.

Like it or not people, looks do matter. The perfect example is the Kennedy clan. I think many people in fashion will never forget the mark they left on what style meant in this country.

JFK and Jackie had style. The American people not only looked to them to be the first family of the United States, but also to show them what they should be wearing or doing. When Jackie redecorated the White House, every housewife in the country watched her tour of the new decor, and started begging their husbands to let them do the same in their homes. Men groomed themselves to be a JFK, and women did the same to be Jackie.

They were not only the ideal political family, they were the ideal for how political people should look: glamorous, stylish, classic, and warm. In the wake of our current presidential disaster, it has become even more apparent that we need to return to our warmer, more glamorous days before "The Hill" became a see of black, badly-fitted suits, heels that even a grandmother shouldn't wear, and choker-style pearls. Everyone looks like they are going to a funeral. Which might be why this country is dying--wrong state of mind. Just a thought ... think about it for second.

This has to change people. I'm not saying to throw out all black suits. I am simply suggesting that maybe it would be better to vary the look up. Mix a color in the rotation, accessorize better, and get suits that fit. I have already attacked the men in a blog about their unflattering suits. This blog should really move toward attacking the women and their drab leanings for clothes. Whether you are a female politician, or a politician's wife, please learn to carry yourselves better. Honestly, there are librarians who can put together a better outfit. And that's me being kind.

I'm sure many of you think that as a politician, Sarah Palin is a decent dresser. While I do applaud some of her pieces, on the whole she is a mess when you get down to the details. She looks like she puts her makeup on with a butterknife, her glasses make her face fat, that hairdo is done, and her shoe choices leave a lot to be said for her abilities in office. I am a firm believer that shoes make a person. They tell you a lot about the person. Her shoes are lazy ... which tells me that no only does she lay there in bed, but she may lay there in office too. Whatever the man says is the gospel. But what do you expect from a stereotypical pageant girl, right?

She is not all bad though. A few minor alterations to her wardrobe would spruce her up nicely. Her glasses need to be more square. That would slim down her face a little more. Right now, she looks a little pudgy. Of course, toning down that pageant makeup would be on my top list of things she should do. And I really need her to pick a hairstyle that doesn't look like she's about to be crowned by the reigning Miss Whatever. Oh, and the shoes. She has had some good days. This photo is a picture of a good day. She splashed a little style and femininity into her wardrobe. Where did she miss the boat? ACCESSORIES!! Yes. You know those are my mainstay in any wardrobe. The red shoes just look out of place on all that serious black. A simple tweak could have been a chunky bracelet in that red color, and she could have easily had a tailor line the suit jacket in that red, and make a slit in the back of the skirt lines with that red. OR, skip the bracelet, open the jacket to see the red lining and have a necklace with a red pendant on it. Little touches like that make the red less shocking. It's okay to mix colors, but they should have some place in what you're wearing. Don't just fling color anywhere.

Now, take a look at one of her disasters:

Now, what the hell is this? Everything about it says wrong. There's no salvaging this look. If you have any piece of it, throw it in the trash immediately and don't look back.

But now you see how with just a few tweaks of a decent wardrobe, you can go from drab on The Hill to fab on The Hill. It just takes a little effort, and a personal commitment to look as good as you want to feel. You know when I feel good about myself ... powerful, intelligent, confident, organized, and in charge of my own destiny? When I am well-groomed, and looking sharp. Clothes can make the woman. It's a morale booster.

Now, on to a politician's wife. We have Michelle Obama. I promise you I am not biased at all about political parties. I equally hate all of them. But I will say that Michelle Obama is a potential first lady who is put together. McCain's wife looks nice too, but all that red on her pale skin makes her look like a hooker. I'm sorry ... a call girl ... they don't do the ho' stroll. Michelle Obama manages to pull together very dignified, and yet sexy, but still elegant looks. I have to put up photos of several looks I like. She's very fashion forward, while being classic. And that is a style worth applauding.

Doesn't that look good? We're gonna have to do something better for that hair, but a silkier perm and a little product will have the worked out.

I do want you all to pay attention to Barack and McCain in these photos. Notice that Barack has a better fitted suit. It's tailored closer to his body. That is the way it's supposed to be. We just need him out of the typical black suit. He does a decent job on ties. The color does stand out, which may be his style: accentuating the ties. That is not a bad way to go.

So, the overall message int his blog is that living in the political realm should not be an excuse to look drab and slovenly. When you have power, you should dress the part. What you wear influences people. People who don't have the power, or want it, look up to you. They wear what you wear, they shop where you shop, they read what you read, and so on. So, if you show up looking wrong, it's a message that that is okay. It's not! Professional dress is not find the ugliest stuffiest thing to wear. It is about a higher standard of elegance and dignity. I believe that was lost after Dynasty went off the air....it's time to reclaim it. The 80's glamorous wealth & power look can still be done. This is the U.S.! Having our cake and eating it too is the American way... but we are so consumed in the power and money that we forgot what that brings ... a responsibility to set a proper example to those who will one day enter that world. That example includes how to present yourself. Join me in giving the professional look a much needed makeover.

Here's to style. Cheers!

... these Crocs are a sham.

I think by now everyone is familiar with Crocs. These hideous shoes that have taken over people's feet throughout the world. Why? Why oh why would you do something like that? What did your feet do to you to deserve this horrible fate.

My blog is about style ... and Crocs are not it. They are on the same level with flip-flops: a trend that should have never been. I think the best indicator of how completely useless these shoes are, take a look at all the children that were injured when the shoes got caught in escalator mechanisms. That was the Universe's way of punishing the fashionless masses who would dare wear those things. What better way to punish you ridiculously clueless fools than to take out your children for your pathetic attempts at style.

Yeah.....I said it! But, if you feel that was too harsh for you, I have a nicer way of voicing my disgust, and your fate for wearing them:

I am Sam.
I am Sam.
Sam, I am.

That Sam-I-am!
That Sam-I-am!
I do not likethat Sam-I-am!

Do you wear Crocs?

I do not wear them, Sam-I-am.
I do not wear Crocs; they are a sham.

Would you wear them here or there?

I would not wear them here or there.
NO ONE should wear them anywhere.
I do not wear Crocs; they just aren't glam.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

Would you wear them in a house?
Would you wear them to kill a mouse?

I do not like them in a house.
I would not wear them to kill a mouse.
I would not wear them here or there.
NO ONE should wear them anywhere.
I do not wear Crocs; they just aren't glam.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

Would you wear them in a box?
Would you wear them to run from a fox?

Not in a box.
Not to run from a fox.
Not in a house.
Not to kill a mouse.
I would not wear them here or there.
NO ONE should wear them anywhere.
I would not wear Crocs; they just aren't glam.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

Would you?
Could you?
In a car?
Wear them!
Wear them!
Here they are.

I would not, could not, in a car.

You may like them.
You will see.
You may like them in a tree!

I would not, could not, in a tree.
Not in a car!
You let me be.

I do not like them in a box.
I would not wear them to run from a fox.
I do not like them in a house.
I would not wear them to kill a mouse.
I would not wear them here or there.
NO ONE should wear them anywhere.
I do not wear Crocs; they just aren't glam.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

A train!
A train!
A train!
A train!

Could you, would you, on a train?

Not on a train!
Not in a tree!
Not in a car!
Sam, let me be!
I would not, could not, in a box.
I could not, would not, to run from a fox.
I will not wear them to kill a mouse.
I will not wear them in a house.
I would not wear them here or there.
NO ONE should wear them anywhere.
I do not wear Crocs; they just aren't glam.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

Say!
In the dark?
Here in the dark!
Would you, could you, in the dark?

I would not, could not, in the dark.

Would you, could you, in the rain?

I would not, could not, in the rain.
Not in the dark.
Not on a train.
Not in a car.
Not in a tree.
I will not wear them, Sam, you see.
Not in a house.
Not in a box.
Not to kill a mouse.
Not to run from a fox.
I would not wear them here or there.
NO ONE should wear them anywhere.

You do not like Crocs?

I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

Could you, would you, while milking a goat?

I would not, could not, while milking a goat!

Would you, could you, on a boat?

I could not, would not, on a boat.
I will not, will not, while milking a goat.
I will not wear them in the rain.
I will not wear them on a train.
Not in the dark!
Not in a tree!
Not in a car!
You let me be!
I do not like them in a box.
I will not wear them to run from a fox.
I will not wear them in a house.
I would not wear them to kill a mouse.
I would not wear them here or there.
NO ONE should like them ANYWHERE.
I do not wear Crocs; they just aren't glam.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.

You do not like them, so you say.
Try them!
Try them!
And you may.
Try them and you may, I say.

Sam!
If you will let me be, I will try them.

You will see.

Say!
I like Crocs; now I'm the man.
I do!
I like them, Sam-I-am!
And I would wear them in a boat.
And I would wear them while milking a goat ...
And I will wear them in the rain.
And in the dark.
And on a train.
And in a car.
And in a tree.
They are so snug, so snug, you see!
So I will wear them in a box.
And I will wear them to run from a fox.
And I will wear them in a house.
And I will wear them to kill a mouse.
And I will wear them here or there.
Say, I will wear them ANYWHERE!
I do so like Crocs; but my girl did not, and left me man.
Damn you!
Damn you, Sam-I-am!
Now I'm alone, and stuck with just my hand.

Here's to style. Cheers!

Barney Choo, Manolo Boobah, Nine Wiggles, Elmo & Gabbana ... the newest frontier in "cry" fashion.

There is a new emerging fashion trend for babies --high heel crib shoes for girls. That's right: high heels for babies.

Two Seattle mothers, Britta Bacon and Hayden Porter, have created a new look for babies on the "crawlway" ... or should I say the "kittywalk?" These are little baby shoes with a heel that collapses if a baby attempts to stand on them. But, they are shaped like a heel. And they come in six styles: leopard satin, hot pink patent, black satin, zebra satin, black patent, and hot pink satin. Now, even the youngest girls can have a complete outfit. As we all know, no outfit is complete without the right shoes.

Heelarious is the line that makes these shoes. And at $35 a pair, your baby can have them. Many people have been upset by this newest development. They say that this has taken fashion too far. Do I agree? I don't know. Would I put my daughter in them? Hell no!

But taking these shoes out of the context of a baby wearing heels, and all that can imply, let's think about the overall message here. What is this? It is a way to get babies in the early mindset of thinking about looking good. Now, the burdens of beauty are falling at the babies' doorsteps. And why shouldn't it? Maybe heels are not the way to go, rather clothes for babies, in more than Easter colors, wouldn't be too bad of an idea. Baby fashions...... I like the idea.

Who knows ... high fashion for babies could produce the next Diana Vreeland, or Coco Chanel, or Anna Wintour. The game is getting to be for the younger and younger. If you want your child taking over the world, you have to get them on the right track earlier now than you used to. Nowadays, you don't have your teenage years to discover yourself ... who you are. By teenage years you should already know and be making plans for your future. Youth has responsibilities. And putting grown up shoes on a baby is just a subtle implication of that fact. Isn't it funny how fashion is always intertwined with the changing times? Every change in society's development has a fashion to it. Fashion really is everywhere.

I think the best way to wrap up this blog is just to say plainly that regardless of your feelings toward this trend, it is here. It is a reflection of the times we live in. Like it or love it people, babies can now strut the playpens looking better than most of you. The gauntlet has been thrown down. What are you gonna do about it?

Here's to style. Cheers!

Men: the ultimate style accessory for women.

A thought just occurred to me as I'm sitting here in class: what is the must have accessory for every woman to feel stylish and beautiful? And then it struck me out of nowhere ... MEN!!!
Of course! Why didn't I think of it before? Men make the best accessories for a woman.

I'm sure some of you assume that I am joking about this, but I am very serious. Think about this for a moment: have you ever taken a good look at a haute couture magazine? What did you notice? Contrast.

Take this recent photo from America's Next top Model:


Do you know what makes this photo high fashion? Her stance. McKey is in a couture dress, in a nature setting, and she's rough and tough. Tyra said it best in another shot: to make a photo high fashion, project the opposite of what you're wearing. So, if you were in a ball gown, maybe a grungy, slouching stance would then make the shot high fashion. It's all about contrast. This is why girls are in $5,000 dress with combat boots on a motorcycle. It's edgy and interesting.

Here's where the man comes in. When you go out at night, and you want to look your best, take a man with you. If you're high class and luxury, maybe have a scruffy rocker-type on your arm. And get a photograph of the two of you together. I guarantee if you do this right, you will look even more stunning. And isn't that what an accessory does? You've got your "Freakum Dress" on, bring a man in a more conservative suit. Again, attention moves to you...and you look great.

Sit down one day, and really think about the look you are wearing, and find a guy for the night that contrasts with it. When you both compliment each other, you fade away. You want to be the star? Steal the spotlight. Make sure he looks good in his role, but not better than you. The accessory must enhance you, not cover you. And what makes a man the ultimate accessory? He can be changed with each outfit. A suit one day, jeans and t-shirt on another, and so forth. A beard one day, shaved on another, a stubble day ... you get the picture. It's likely that you're attracted to someone who has an opposite personality to you, so why not look the parts as well.

Hmmm...maybe this style tip is a little too far, but I wholeheartedly support it. Give it a try ... it can't hurt to experiment a little. Good luck.

Here's to style. Cheers!

Most men's suits just don't suit me ...

I really think this should go without saying, but every man should have at least one good suit in his closet. You never know when you may need to go to the closet and be ready for a grand occasion. For a woman--and a growing population of men--there is nothing sexier than a man in a well-fitted, good suit. Men, we just look better when we are suited up. No matter what your size. A suit is like snow: a magical blanket that hides what's ugly, and makes everything beautiful.

Unfortunately, most men turn what should be a simple look into something tacky, bulky, and generally unflattering without even thinking of it. Think of how many men you have seen in a suit too big for their bodies, or too small. Most men don't care how they look. And that is tragic. This blog will help any man select a perfect-fitting suit. As I sit here in one of my tax classes, I noticed that the professor is wearing a suit that is all wrong for his body. It really makes him look like a homeless man who just bought a suit at the Salvation Army for an interview to get himself off the streets. A mean picture, yes; a true picture, hell yes.

A nice, properly worn suit looks good everywhere from the office, to the opera, to dinner, and on the way to bed. It is the equivalent to the little black dress for women. It's a closet staple for any man. Just choose the right one, or you'll lose style points that are very easy to pick up. If you follow these simple rules, I am certain I will make you a GQ Man of Style:

1. Choose the right fabric.

Let me be clear about one thing men: there are only three basic fabrics to choose from, so no need to go any farther unless you are an advanced dresser--wool, polyester, and cotton (yes, there are cotton suits being made). I cannot give a preference between one of the other. You need to be aware of the feel of the suit on your skin. Some people maybe allergic to wool, or polyester. Remember that you have to be comfortable in the suit. Hives do not equal comfortable.

2. If the pants don't fit, your suit ain't shit.

The waistline of your pants needs to be at a comfortable fit. Pants should sit comfortably on the waist, just above the hips. As far as pleated pants are concerned, it depends on your body type. If you are a little chubby in the stomach area, then you can get away with wearing pleats since it will help cover it up. If you are thinner, then stay away from them. Pleats will only make you appear skinnier. Pleats should not open. If you are wearing flat front pants, be careful that the pockets do not gape. Both indicate that the pants are tight.

As far as the hem of your pants, pant length should reach the heel in back and allow for a break in the front. Pleated pants can be worn with or without cuffs. Be careful on the cuff / uncuff issue. A cuffed pant makes you look shorter. On the other hand, cuffed pants show maturity. It's a judgment call. If you are wearing flat front pants, plain and uncuffed bottoms are the way to go.

3. Stop wearing your Dad's shirts.

The sleeve length needs to be exact. Stop wearing shirts too big for you. Remember that this is your "good suit." Everything should fit just right. Tailoring is not just for the rich and fabulous. Sleeves should come to the base of the palm when arms are at your sides. Once you put on your suit jacket, the cuffs of your shirt should show 1/2". Be aware that it is common for arms to be different lengths. Tailoring will keep everything properly even.

4. Choose your jacket wisely.

The suit’s jacket needs to fit easily across your stomach in order to appear professional. It should not be overly tight, but rather allow for some play when the jacket is buttoned. A two-button suit is an American classic. However, I am a fan of the three-button, or four-button for some people, suit jackets. The key is to know your waistline and what flatters it. For a thinner man, I would recommend the classic two-button. For a larger-framed man (not fat necessarily, but an actual large frame with broad shoulders), I like a three-button. I reserve the four-button for a taller man, or a man who could use the extra length of a four-button. Get to know you, and what you need to look your best.

5. Get it together ... you're suit should not "taste the rainbow."

Colors has always been a problem for men. Steve Harvey is not the authority on suits. A red suit only looks good on women, and Prince. That's it gentlemen. And the same goes for violet, and the rest of the ROYGBIV spectrum. Black, charcoal, gray, midnight blue, brown, tan, slate, do you see where I'm going guys? These are colors that work. This suit must be multi-functional. Save a red suit for Halloween, or the Player's Ball. And please....PLEASE...choose one color. Men should only wear a suit with one color jacket, and a different color pant when they are in prep school. It is tragic, and a waste of material. Segregate the colors of a suit. It's okay....the Supreme Court won't come after you for it.

I hope this has been helpful for you. I want to see hot, sexy men of all shapes and sizes in their suits blowing these women's minds (and the booming population of men who like it too).

Here's to style. Cheers!